Drumming Song
by TheGoodShipFluffy
Summary: A slightly abstract little MarshField-y story, structured around the refrain to Florence and the Machine's "Drumming Song" and following Kate from the end of Episode 2 through Episode 4. Mostly internal monologue and thoughts, without any explicitly named romantic feelings, but can easily be set in the "What Friends Do" timeline.


_Louder than sirens_

Max's arm was around her shoulders as they walked out the door of the girls' dorms. Kate's heart pounded hard and fast, and it was all she could do to put one foot in front of the other. The courtyard was full of people, and Kate could tell they were all staring at her, but she couldn't really bring herself to care. People had been staring at her for a week already, what was another few moments?

She'd been ready to end it all. But somehow, Max had gotten up to the roof and talked her down. Even sobbing into the brunette's shoulder, she somehow felt safe. For the first time in over a week, she felt protected, and like she wasn't alone. With Max protecting her, she didn't really care if people were staring, and the rushing of her pulse in her ears drowned out anything they might have been saying.

Flashing lights as they came to the parking lot signaled that an ambulance was pulling in. Kate could faintly hear the wailing of sirens, too, but it was covered still by the pounding in her head and heart. EMTs got out of the vehicle and led her away from Max, but she kept looking back over her shoulder at the brunette, wishing she could feel that slender arm around her again. As the ambulance left Blackwell, she sat in the back and looked out the window, watching Max recede.

 _Louder than bells_

With supervision, Kate was allowed to leave her room to go to service at the hospital chapel. It wasn't her familiar church or anything, but it was nice to have some structure during those days at the hospital. Even if it was just a nondescript interfaith prayer service, she still enjoyed communing with God.

Most days she arrived early, and she'd just sit in one of the benches at the back, eyes closed and head bowed. Some of the time she prayed, but she also liked to just think about things in that peaceful space. Sure, her room was quiet, but it wasn't a place for thinking. Not about anything of consequence, anyway.

A few minutes before service, the chaplain rang the chime at the head of the room. It wasn't a deafening noise or anything, since this was a hospital and all, but it was loud enough to let anyone loitering in the hall or the nearby hospital café know that service would be starting shortly. The first time Kate heard it she'd been jarred out of her thoughts, but in the following days it was easy enough to just block the noise out and focus on her concerns. Getting well. Being closer to God. Max…

 _Sweeter than Heaven_

The door handle turned as Kate sat in the chair, sketching. She looked up, confused. None of the doctors or nurses usually came by at this time, and her breakfast tray had already been taken back. A second later, though, Max stepped into the room and Kate stopped fretting immediately.

Putting aside her sketchpad and pencil, Kate hastily rose from her chair and closed the distance with Max, pulling the brunette into a tight hug. It had only been two days, but Kate was still overjoyed to see her friend, and deeply touched that she'd thought to come visit! After a second of surprise, Max returned the hug, wrapping her arms around Kate and holding her close for a few moments.

For the most part, the hospital had been calming. True, everything felt a little too sterile, and there weren't any familiar faces, but the chapel was very relaxing and tranquil, and the psychiatrist she'd been assigned was kind. But having Max's arms around her was another level of comforting entirely. Max, who had cared about her when no one else did. Max, who had talked her down from the edge. In that moment, Kate let herself get lost in the brunette's embrace, and just gave in to bliss.

 _And hotter than Hell_

Long after Max had left, Kate still felt like she was burning. Those few minutes with the brunette had been so nice, but somehow Kate felt even worse once she'd gone. She wasn't really sure _why_ she was feeling so fidgety and perturbed. Maybe it was because they'd talked about Nathan? Or maybe not. Maybe having Max come and go in such a brief window of time, with the accompanying elation then lull, was just having a weird effect on her, given her already uneasy emotional state just then.

She tried her best to ignore it and just focus on her drawing, but that proved fruitless. She'd start to sketch something then sigh and put the pad down, biting her lip and feeling uneasy. If only Max would come back… Max always made her feel better.

Eventually she decided there was nothing for it but time, and so she resolved to just try and nap until it passed. Sleep was slow to come, though, and Kate found herself tossing and turning in her bed, her skin prickling and her face a little flushed. She just needed… She wasn't sure what she needed. Comfort. Calm. A guardian angel.

Holding one of her pillows close to her chest, Kate thought back to earlier, when she and Max were hugging. She'd felt just fine _then_. Better than fine, really. With Max hugging her, she hadn't felt any sort of anxiety or discomfort. Screwing up her face in concentration, Kate pictured Max's face and imagined the way it felt to have the brunette's comforting arms around her. That seemed to help some, and eventually Kate Marsh fell asleep.


End file.
